At last, I did it. I had told myself I would never be late in this course. But at the end of the day, what I worried happened to me. Finally, I managed to be late for 45 minutes. How on earth did I take the wrong bus? What a stupid mistake! I know everyone does make mistakes. I know to err is human. Still I can't be carefree. Should I be? Maybe not. If I don't worry about anything, how can I improve myself? So a little worry is not bad, I suppose. What is important is that I learn from my mistakes. Whenever you fall, pick up something!

Alan said that we often push things down. When similar events happen, similar emotions get back. Do I experience that? I don't remember anything that could be an example of the theory. Maybe it happens to me unconsciously; therefore, I am not aware of it. I try to see what is told in the class in my life. Sometimes, like this case, I don't find what is supposed to be. Which doesn't necessarily mean that the assumption is wrong. Maybe it doesn't have to be valid for everybody. People are different, aren't they? Maybe it is there, but I haven't realized it yet. But it seems to me that the subconscious assumption is too powerful. It could explain virtually everything. You could hardly refute it. You may say, "But I can't see any obvious specific connection in terms of cause and effect. And I don't feel that way." In response to this argument, proponents of the-subconscious-is-the-real-king theory may say, "You don't realize what is really going on. You are not aware of it, but it affects you subconsciously."

The assumption is that we are carrying uncompleted gestalts. We need to complete that. Yes, I think so. Particularly when I don't tell people something emotional, those unspoken words remain inside me. If an unwelcome feeling comes up because of a person, I usually find it very relieving to talk to the person who caused me to feel that way if the person is suitable enough to talk such matters. (Lorraine, my host family, has recently been my victim in that sense!)

Alan said the counselling skills we are learning in the course are easy. Anybody can learn them. It is just about practice. It seems so to me as well. I think I can do counselling. Yes, I am able to do that. But I don't think I would do it professionally. It would be gloomy to listen to people's problems all the time. Besides, I would probably feel bad if my counselling didn't work. Maybe I can use the skills just in my everyday life.